Licensed Professional Counselor
Welcome to my website! I own the counseling practice of Pam Solem-Weser LPC, PLLC. I hope you find this website useful in helping you make a decision about working with me. Please contact me with any additional questions you have.
My story
Growing up in a divorced family, my personal goal has been to have a happy, lasting marriage and my professional goal as a couples therapist, is to help other couples learn how to have healthy, happy relationships and families. In the early years of our marriage, my husband and I found it challenging to resolve our arguments and communicate effectively. We went to couples counseling and found it nearly impossible to follow through with the recommended action plans while we were feeling so hurt by the other. I was frustrated with the lack of help in couples therapy and vowed to someday help other couples in a more effective manner. Despite the lack of help, my husband and I eventually found our way to creating a close, happy marriage.
I found the couple therapy model that I was looking for over 15 years ago when I attended a workshop given by Dr. Sue Johnson about Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT). I was so excited to learn about this most effective couples therapy. First, the extensive research on EFT showed an astonishing statistic that 90% of couples' relationships improve by the end of therapy. That alone was enough to capture my interest. But then as she described the process of EFT therapy, it made sense to me on a personal level too. EFT therapy helps couples feel safe to talk the other from a more vulnerable, softer place inside of themselves instead of the usual defensive angry/shut down positions in conflicts. In my own marriage, I knew that when we had learned to talk from this softer place, our marriage was transformed. I was thrilled to learn how to help couples transform their marriages.
The road to learning EFT is a very difficult one for a couples therapist. It requires continual ongoing training, study, supervision, and practice to become a skilled EFT therapist. But the journey has been immensely rewarding to help couples who may feel hopeless about their marriages at the start of couples therapy, grow to become loving, close couples by the end of therapy.
My husband and I have been married for 35 years now and we are the parents of a 32 year-old married daughter and 29 year-old son, and now the grandparents of 2 grandsons, 1 and 4 years old. I continue to learn and grow in my roles of wife, mother, and grandmother and have found EFT to be immensely helpful to me in these relationships. I personally feel great compassion for my couples' struggles with their marriages and parenting. I also feel compassion for the pain and challenges that divorce, remarriage, and blending families can bring. With all of the varying configurations of families, my goal is to help people have the happy homes they long for.
Educational Background
I earned a Master in Counseling from Arizona State University in the Counseling Psychology department. Upon graduation, I went on to complete a rigorous residency program in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavior Therapy. I have completed basic and advanced training, study, and supervision in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) to become a Certified EFT Therapist and Supervisor. My work experience includes teaching a graduate-level counseling class at Phoenix Seminary.
I use only research-based therapies in my work with clients. Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) has been validated by over 20 years of empirical research and is accepted by the American Psychological Association. Research has shown that EFT is highly effective in helping couples develop close, intimate relationships. I use this therapy with all of my couples and families.
I am a Certified EFT Therapist through the International Center for Excellence for Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy. These certification processes requires completion of the basic and advanced trainings, supervision, and ongoing evaluations of my work as a therapist to demonstrate competency as an EFT therapist. I am also a Certified EFT Supervisor to therapists who are learning to become EFT Therapists as well as the former EFT Trainer in Arizona who taught both the basic and advanced trainings.
I also have been extensively training in the Internal Family Systems model. This model is extremely valuable in helping clients explore their internal worlds and in healing past wounds. I use it in work with individuals and couples. It has been exciting to find such an effective adjunct to my work with couples and to find such a powerful healing agent for clients.
I have taken numerous parenting classes which have helped me in parenting my own children. This experience along with my knowledge of psychology has enabled me to successfully coach parents on becoming more effective with their children. I am experienced in helping parents with children all ages including teens and children with challenging temperaments.
I have considerable training and experience in using Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) which is a well-researched, highly effective form of individual therapy for depression, anxiety, and more.
Christian Counseling
Although I work with people of varied backgrounds and ethnicities, I do provide Christian counseling for those who are seeking it. In the past, my husband and I actively served on the Marriage Ministry team at our church and taught numerous marriage enrichment classes.